


Of All Endings, This

by SpicyRedPaladin



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Blood, Flowers, Hanahaki Disease, I'm Going to Hell, M/M, Unresolved Angst, almost major character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-29
Updated: 2018-12-29
Packaged: 2019-09-29 14:41:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17205302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpicyRedPaladin/pseuds/SpicyRedPaladin
Summary: In a perfect ending, Lance confesses and Shiro returns his subordinate's feelings. In a perfect ending, Shiro confesses the moment he discovers Lance has Hanahaki. In a perfect ending, Lance never contracts the disease and tells his hero about his love on his own terms.This ending is not a perfect ending.





	Of All Endings, This

**Author's Note:**

> My 60th fic! Of course it ends up being something crazy like this, right? Well, please don't break into my house and gut me. At least I'm posting _something_ , right?
> 
> Beta'd by Fandoms_Everywhere_Untied right here on AO3!  
> ~Adam

Lance wheezed softly, coughing a bit. He'd been feeling a rasping in his throat for days now, like there was something stuck in the back of his windpipe. Or even in his lungs themselves, as he'd had aching and stabbing pains ever since they'd left a jungle world they'd been on a diplomatic mission to. Coran had seen nothing on his initial scans though, so it was probably nothing.

The doors to the lounge whirred open and Lance couldn't help the grin brought to his face. Everyone else was already waiting, setting up the screen for a 'movie night'. Honestly, they were all skeptical when Coran had said that Altea had videos similar to how they described movies back on Earth, but it was something to break up the monotony of their usual routine of drills and missions.

Lance started adding the pillow and blankets he'd dragged from his room to the almost nest they'd all made on the floor, because that was way more fun than trying to get comfortable on the actual lounge seats. Once everything was ready, all seven members of Team Voltron plopped down.

Lance tried very hard to enjoy it, he really did. But there was one thing, other than the itching in the back of his throat, that made it very hard to focus on the warm cuddle pile or the weird weblum documentary that they were apparently watching.

Lance was leaned right up against Shiro. Because of course that just happened to be where they settled. Of course he just had to be right up against his leader, the man he'd had a crush on literally since they day they met.

Lance sat as still as he could, his cheeks flushing whenever Shiro shifted and they brushed closer together. All the while, the pain in his lungs and scratching in his throat grew worse and worse, as coughs usually do when you try to hold them in. Finally, after almost an hour of the torture, Lance pulled himself out of the pile, coughing into his sleeve before apologizing.

"Sorry, guys, I'm gonna go. I think I might be coming down with something..."

He hurried out and down the hall, hacking into his sleeve again.  He must be doing something right, as it felt like whatever was stuck there was about to come loose. Lance managed to keep himself from coughing until he got to the bathroom, grabbing a washcloth and hacking one more time.

Finally, whatever it was stuck t his throat came free. Lance stared in awed confusion at what was laying on the cloth. A violet rose petal lay there, speckled with blood. It looked so innocent and inconspicuous. Lance folded the washcloth and stuck it in his pocket, fully intending on bringing this up to Coran. It must have been some weird alien disease.

In reality, it was three whole days before Lance got around to asking Coran about the disease. And it wasn't really by his own volition. It was all because of that mission he'd gone on. Another diplomatic mission, there were a lot of those these days, this time with just himself and Shiro. They were really the only two who could go, since the others were busy working out some error in the Castleship's system.

Everything had started fine. Touch down in their ship was smooth, neither of them flopped the traditional greeting, everything was peachy.  The king signed his planet into the Voltron Coalition, a major help to their cause since this was a huge trade hub, they had a feast to celebrate, and then afterwards the paladins were invited to a celebratory ball. And that was probably where things went downhill for Lance.

It was probably the king urging the two to share a dance that did it. Lance's heart fluttered when Shiro smiled and extended a hand to him. He was fine to let Shiro lead, was surprised by how well the both could dance to the strange tempo that the alien music followed. Lance's heart fluttered as the dance brought them chest to chest. Shiro looked so handsome, his hair slicked back to stay out of his eyes. And then it happened.

It was like a thousand thorns piercing Lance's lungs.. He dropped to his knees, clutching his chest and gasping for breath, a whimper escaping him. Shiro knelt quickly, taking hold of Lance's shoulders as the blue paladin began coughing and wheezing, blood and flower petals splattering against the beautiful tiled floor.

A whisper rippled through the party goers, a single word in every lip. Hanahaki. Neither got the chance to ask what the word meant, though, as they were quickly escorted back to their ship with a simple assurance that this did not affect their newly forged alliance.

Back on the castleship, hell breaking loose was an apt comparison. Lance was rushed into a medpod, the others rushing to the room as Shiro shut the pod and Lance was taken by the darkness. When he came out, everyone was gone except Coran and Allura, who watched him nervously. More worrying, however, was that the itch and pain hadn't gone away, even with the stint in the pod.

They were all silent for a moment before Coran sighed, speaking up. "My boy, I don't quite know how to give you this news... Lance, you're dying..."

Lance stared quietly, brows furrowing. How could he be dying? He'd just gotten out of the healing pod for quiznak's sake! The human shook his head, laughing dryly. This had to be some sort of joke. Some really bad joke. Right?

Allura looked down. "Lance, he's telling the truth. I'm sorry. And I fear that I'm the reason you're dying."

Another silent pause. Coran spoke up again.

"You seem to have contracted a disease called Hanahaki by the locals of the planet you visited. You've probably had it for awhile, though. Hanahaki causes flowers to grow from a seed lodged in your lungs. It's nourished by harbouring feelings towards someone who doesn't feel the same..."

Allura nodding, looking up at him. "I'm sorry, Lance. I didn't realize that my rejecting your advances would cause you to become sick like this,"

Lance just stared at them silently for a moment, his thoughts racing. He was dying because there were flowers in his lungs. Roses, if the petals he coughed up meant anything. And Allura thought it was her fault. He licked hi dry lips before shaking his head.

"No, Allura, it's not you... It.. It's Shiro..."

The two stared at him quietly before Allura came forward, hugging him gently. Coran looked down, sighing softly. The three sat together for hours after Lance's confession, talking through their options. At the rate the flowers were growing, Lance would probably be dead before the week was over, especially if Lance confessed and was denied. A confession, after all, would cut off the plant's source of nourishment, and it would wither and die.

The only other way to get rid of the affliction was to undergo a surgery that would erase Lance's memories not only of having the affliction, but also of Shiro. He wouldn't know who he was or why he couldn't remember him.

Lance opted out of that. Call him selfish, but he didn't want to forget Shiro. He loved him, with all his flaws and mannerisms. He didn't want to forget them after having spent so long memorizing them. So he decided a confession was the way to go. Not immediately, though. He needed to talk to some of the others. Well, all of the others. Even Keith.

And that was what brought Keith, Pidge, and Hunk to Lance's room in the middle of the night. They all sat on the bed, listening to Lance as he told them what was happening between coughs and bloody petals. To all of their surprise, even his own, Keith wrapped his arms around Lance's shoulders, hugging him close. Lance burst into tears, clinging to Keith as though that could save him from this sickness.

Hunk and Pidge quickly jumped on trying to talk Lance into surgery. It was the best option. A confession was such a risk, after all. What if Shiro said no? Which was very likely, according to Keith. Lance could die right there if the disease gripped him tightly enough.

In the end, though, Lance won out. It was his decision, in the end. His life that was held on a thread. The others did convince him to wait until the next day, though.

Keith, however, wouldn't wait to try and help. Even if he and Lance didn't get along, they were part of a family, now. And family did not leave each other to rot. Which was exactly why he  _ had to tell Shiro _ , whether Lance wanted it or not.

Shiro opened his door groggily, confused as to why Keith would be pounding on it at two o'clock in the morning. The red paladin marched inside, crossing his arms and glaring at his leader. The elder rubbed his eyes and yawned, waiting patiently for Keith to tell him what was going on.

"Lance is in love with you, and he's going to die because you don't feel the same."

That woke Shiro up real fast. He stared at Keith incredulously for a few moments before realizing that he wasn't joking. The black paladin leaned against the wall, looking down.

"Is me loving him really the only way to save him?"

"No, there's a surgery. But he won't know who you are or that he was ever sick. We'll have to tell him he got selective amnesia or something. All I know is that if he dies, it's going to be your fault, to an extent."

Shiro sighed and shook his head. If it were any other paladin, he wouldn't believe them. But Keith didn't lie, at least not to him. His second wouldn't just tell him something like this out of the blue if it wasn't true. Which brought him to the actual problem. Whether or not he could suddenly start loving Lance.

Lance wasn't the worst person to try falling in love with. But Shiro wouldn't call him ideal, either. Lance... Didn't really fit his type. Lance was loud and energetic, where Shiro usually preferred for calm and quiet types. Not to mention he was still trying to get back to Adam.

"Keith, I really wish I could. But Adam is-"

"No, Shiro. Adam isn't waiting. He told you he wasn't going to wait. And he didn't. When we disappeared, Adam was planning a wedding. His  _ own  _ wedding."

Shiro winced a bit, taken back by the news. Yes, Adam had said he wouldn't be waiting but... He didn't think he would have moved on already. After all, they'd been planning their own marriage when he'd left. 

"That... Doesn't change anything... How long does Lance even have? It can't be long enough for me to fall in love with him. Even if we have to make up excuses for why he doesn't remember, the surgery is the better option."

Keith glared back, gritting his teeth. "You're not even going to try to help him? He said he's been in love with you for years Shiro! That it was love at first sight! He's throwing up purple roses for quiznak's sake!" The red paladin shook his head, moving towards the door. "He's going to confess to you tomorrow."

With that, Keith left, leaving Shiro with the knowledge that he could very well rip his team apart in just a few hours.

Breakfast was tense, to say the very least. Keith tapped his spoon against his bowl anxiously, Hunk shifted his eyes back and forth between the others, and Pidge poked her goo around her plate. Lance and Shiro were the only ones even trying to act normal, but it was clear both were stiff.  All in all, it was stressful.

After everyone eventually finished eating, Keith and Hunk grabbed everyone's dishes and hurried off to the kitchen, it being their turn to clean up. Pidge also quickly ditched, citing needing to go over some complex code and then just babbling as she half-ran from the room. 

That just left Shiro and Lance. Alone. Lance stared at the table quietly for a moment before looking up.

"Shiro, I need to talk to-"

A fresh round of coughing cut off Lance's words. Shiro moved over to him, patting his back gently to try and help. Once Lance was through his fit and had taken a few rasping breaths, he wasted no time.

"Shiro, I love you. I've been in love with you for years..."

Shiro was silent, his hand still on Lance's back. He'd thought so hard about what he would say, but now none of came to his mind. It really was true. Lance kept going.

"I.. I'm dying, Shiro, and I'm so scared, because Coran said the only way to fix it without forgetting you is if you tell me you love me too and I'm afraid you're not going to say it back...."

Shiro stayed silent.

"Sh...Shiro...? Please... Say something... Say anything."

A pause.

"I'm sorry, Lance."

Shiro's hand left Lance's back and his footsteps retreated. The blue paladin bent forward, curling in on himself as he began to sob.

Lance didn't leave his room after that. More like he couldn't, really. Hunk stayed at his side the whole time, holding Lance down whenever he would cry out and try to claw the thorns out of his lungs. The others tried time and time again to talk Lance into getting the surgery, it was better than dying with this pain. But he said no, time and again. He wouldn't forget. And he knew it was selfish, that it was hurting the others, but he just couldn't.

Unbeknownst to the others, Shiro often found himself outside Lance's door, listening to Hunk try to soothe him late into the night and listening to Lance's screams of pain. And as he did, he couldn't help but feel prickles of pain in his chest, what he knew to be remorse at his mistake in refusing to try.

It was five days after Shiro's rejection when Lance gripped Hunk's hand tightly, wincing and sobbing as he had been for days. He begged Hunk to apologize to his parents when they got back, because he knew he wouldn't make it through the night. Hunk pressed Lance's hand to his cheek, gritting his teeth when Lance's hand went slack as he passed out again.

The yellow paladin bolted to his feet, both fists coming down on the metal of the table by Lance's bed. He couldn't take another moment of this.

It had been four weeks. The Black, Red, Yellow, and Green paladins were all silent as they went through their days. It was business as usual. Nothing more, nothing less. There was, however, a small light for the group. Something that could always perk up the others when it came through. Even Keith would climb out of his hole when presented with it. That light was Lance. His long missing laughter filled the halls of the castleship again, brighten everyone as they came through. It reminded them all of what the team was supposed to be, a close-knit family.

It was Shiro who was now face to face with this light, a warm smile on the man's face as the two talked. Shiro laughed as Lance shot finger guns and lame pick up lines at him. It had become the usual. Lance flirted more with all of them now, and it had honestly surprised Shiro the first time a line had been directed at him. As their conversation came to a close, Lance gave him a smile.

"Hey, I wanted to say I'm sorry again, by the way. I can't believe I forgot you when I hit my head in that battle. But I'm really glad we're getting to know each other again. You're really cool, Shiro."

Shiro smiled softly as a warm blush spread over his cheeks before coughing into his hand. "Thanks, Lance. You're cool too. Cooler than space, even." The two laughed and Shiro started coughing again, covering his mouth with both hands now. Lace quickly moved forward to pat his back, a worried look on his face. Shiro gave him a smile. "Just coming down with a bug, don't worry about me. I'm going to head off so I don't get you sick."

Lance nodded and waved as they parted. One the two were no longer within sight of each other, Shiro dashed down the hall and to his bathroom, locking the door before leaning over the sink and hacking until a handful of blue rose petals and blood splatters littered his sink. He shook his head with a raspy breath, turning on the water so that those would get washed down to join the others he'd been coughing up.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! If you want me to keep writing, please kudo, and comment if you wanna scream at me!


End file.
